Let me tell you about Suzie
She comes in every Tuesday
And contrary to popular belief
She's not your ordinary floozy
She goes for that front-load
75¢ unlimited dryer
And let me tell you, that's the kind of foresight
In a woman that I really admire
Talkin' 'bout laundromat girls
Let me tell you about Diane
She brings her laundry in a garbage can
And at the end of every load
She leaves in the arms of a different man
She goes out, she comes in
Her clothes are soaking wet
She scoops them up and she throws them in the Speed Queen
And then she meets her boyfriend for a cigarette
Talkin' 'bout laundromat girls
Every time that I see Betty
I know my whites are ready
Now here come Mrs. Waters
I'm gonna need another roll of quarters
Let me tell you about Loretta
No one cleans and softens better
She comes in after midnight
Wearing spike heels and an angora sweater
And she sits and reads
The 2½-year-old People magazines
She cracks her gum and she twirls her hair
As her clothes go 'round and 'round in the crazy machines
